I laugh at myself when I see him now, the boy I completely flipped for last semester when I knew I shouldn't have. The boy that I thought, for some strange reason, felt the same thing toward me because I caught him lookin at me during class a few times (and by a few times...I mean in every class meeting for at least a month).
Even now, I still believe I was right in my assumption. Even now, I still want to see him, go out with him...just hang out with him. I've run into him only twice so far this semester: Once at Wal Mart, and today on campus when our eyes locked across the quad. This sounds too romantic to be true, but it is. James and I were leaving the University Center and heading toward my class when it happened.
And that feeling occured again. That, "Oh he's so cute" feeling. That "I'm in junior high" all over again feeling.
I could be wrong, but I honestly believe that I still go through these junior high feelings because I never truly got the chance to go through them when I was actually that age. I had only one actual crush for my entire life in my hometown, the most popular boy, the one that every girl had a crush on. When I left, I found myself crushing on more guys -- even guys from my hometown that I had never been interested in while actually living there.
Crushes are really unnecessary. The whole "liking" thing is unnecessary. Dating, courting...is any of it truly necessary? I'm not trying to sound bitter. I'm just trying to see the point. When you're ready to get married, then yeah, I guess I can understand the whole dating/courting thing. But pre-teens and teenagers? What is the point?
...okay. I'm not sure where I am heading or even why I am writing this currently. Bed sounds awefully wonderful right now. I believe I'll try that.